Hunger

I had the rare privilege of spending a LOT of time with the Lord today. I'vwe been restless all day. I woke up feeling unsatisfied. Even though everything went well, I still felt unsettled. I just couldn't put my finger on it. It was my day off, so I went to the church. I spent about five hours on the piano (some classical, some worship). There was time in the Beth Moore study, not to mention some good prayer time. Then we had small group tonight. I left small group with that same familiar unsettling feeling. Like something was amok.

Then I figured it out; the Lord is pulling away from me a little bit. He's allowed me to draw near to Him a lot lately, always being right there so I can climb up into His lap. He's taught me about drawing close to Him, and He's made me reflect on how wonderful He is! His forgiveness is fathomless; His wisdom is boundless; His love is deep; His faithfulness is unquestionable; His integrity is perfect; His righteousness is bright; His patience is enduring; His joy is contagious; His presence is intoxicating. Every day lately I've seen that glimpse. Even today I caught it. But He's drawing me somewhere. He's backing a little away from me, and I hunger for Him. I mean long. It's as if nothing is going to be exactly right until I track Him down again. I couldn't wait to get home and read the Bible and pray tonight. Even still, I know I have a little way to go. It's almost frustrating; it reminds me of when Natasha and I were engaged. We were so close, but we just couldn't wait to be together forever. That's me right now with God. I just want to be sealed with Him forever, never to have to be away from Him again! In this time of hunger, I'm remembering one thing with anticipation and thanksgiving: "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled."

Bless Him!