So Many Reasons to Praise

There are so many thigns to post about this morning, but my heart literally soared when I read Psalm 145 today. (If you're reading the Bible layout that I am, you will be blessed!) It seemed as though each phrase rings true in my life as it looks this morning. One of these days, Elizabeth, you or someone around you should really write a song about this one. (Actually, I've sung one, but it was a classical choral piece. I'm talking about a regular church worship song/hymn.)

The Lord is indeed great! I like how verse three says no one can measure His greatness. The KJV says that His greatness is unsearchable. I, for one, have tried on many occasions to search the Lord's greatness. I've tried to compare it to things we understand. This is fruitless, though. The Lord's greatness surpasses even the word "great" itself. Were I to list the Lord's mighty acts (verse four), it would take awhile. For good measure, here are a few:

1) Mom and Ron are here safely, enjoying Northern Maine.

2) The Lord opened many opportunities for us to talk about miracles and faith with them, and we've only been together less than 24 hours!

3) Natasha needed some clothes because her old ones were worn before we moved. Of those that weren't worn, the Lord prompted her to give some to the poor before we left Sussex. We aren't yet stable enough for a new wardrobe. The Lord still came through and provided several new garments from a lady in the church!

4) The Lord has opened a door of ministry for Natasha and me after her internship. Origianlly, I had no interest in the ministry. However, the Lord opened my eyes a few weeks ago. In some time with the Lord on Friday I sensed that this ministry is really our next step. Yesterday I received a call from a pastor asking us/me to come meet the selection committee and church. (Yeah, I know this is the first time most of you are hearing about this. Maybe some day I'll post the whole testimony. For now I'm sitting back and watching something God told me unfold before my very eyes.)

5) McKenzie got his spacer yesterday, and his confidence didn't seem shaken when I saw him.

6) Elizabeth's song on Sunday afternoon has ministered to me, giving words to an expression for which my heart has longed lately. There is no looking back for me!

7) Laura, Chris, Adam, and Pam are all in their respective ministries abroad. This is a great reason to miss friends!

8) Josh e-mailed me. I haven't e-mailed him back yet, but this is a brother with whom I feel connected, though we've rarely talked. He'll be on North America soon, and I'll be able to tell him what an encouragement he is to me.

9) The Lord doesn't have to follow normal immigration patterns. Jeremiah will be able to be married soon after all!

10) The Holy Spirit is moving among many churches with or without amazing music teams, with or without dynamic speakers, with or without programs. His signs and wonders are on the increase, as He shows the real Church (body of Christ) exactly who He really is!

Right, just a few. Ten didn't even scratch the surface! At least we'll have a lot to tell the next generation (verse four). Even when I'm not in my spiritual "A-game," the Lord is tender and gracious. We all know He's more than a tender Lord, but His anger and fury are NEVER separated from His love and mercy. How? Who knows? His greatness is immeasurable, remember? He ALWAYS keeps His promises. ALWAYS! He ALWAYS helps the fallen. ALWAYS! He is ALWAYS close to those who call on Him. ALWAYS! He ALWAYS protects those who love Him (with the safety Dr. Wilson preached about Sunday). ALWAYS!

That's why I can shout out with the psalmist: "I WILL PRAISE THE LORD!! MAY EVERYONE ON EARTH BLESS HIS HOLY NAME FOREVER AND EVER!!"

Unknown God

The concept of the "Unknown God" worshipped in ancient Athens (Acts 17:23) has always intrigued me. Athens was full of so many false gods and idols that it seemed the Unknown God was just another one of many gods. However, Paul picked up on the fact that it wasn't just another god. Somehow, in all their crude worship of their assortment of gods, the Athenians knew there was something more. This Unknown God was still there, worthy of worship, though no one knew why.

Paul helped the Athenians understand that the Unknown God is actually the real God. He was unknown to the Athenians because their worship was centered on ancient folklore and the discussion of new philosophies. Each false god that was worshipped represented an aspect of Greek culture or thought, but the Unknown God cannot be described or formed by human hands or imagination. Instead, this God is above all other gods in divine majesty. Yet, He knows us and loves us. His love sacrificed His only Son, and His power raised His Son back to life!

I cannot read this passage without thinking of so many lost people around the world. As Paul said in the passage, we humans all have our being in Him. It is through the Son that everything was created. Therefore, God is very near to every human on earth. Nature itself testifies to the Lord daily. Many of these cultures spend their time worshipping flase gods based on tradition, ideology, and (all too often) fear. Meanwhile, the Unknown God still waits patiently for the worship due Him. The Unknown God pursues all people, drawing hearts consistently to Himself. Reports by Jesus Film teams in Africa say that men and women have gathered to see the Jesus Film and have trusted Christ, exclaiming, "I just dreamed about that man last night!" This is only one of many ways the Unknown God is making Himself known to the world. May we be placed in circumstances to reveal the Unknown God to people all the time. It is a beautiful thing when the Unknown is revealed in blessing, honor, glory, power, peace, beauty, and love!

How the Lord Responds to Attack

I noticed something new this morning in Acts 16. The story is very familiar. Paul and Silas enter a town in which a demonized fortune-teller tries to thwart the work of the Gospel. Paul commands the demon to leave the girl, and the men who own the the girl throw the town into an uproar over these unconventional Jews. The two are thrown in prison, but the Lord sends an earthquake to release the bonds. Paul and Silas are freed, but not before evangelizing the jailer and challenging the town authorities.

It's this last thing - how they challenged the town authorities - that strikes me. Think about it. Paul and Silas are in jail, but the Lord frees them. They stay there to minister to the jailer, who believes, and subsequently tells the men they can go. Do they go? NO! I wondered why not until the Lord showed me something pretty simple.

When attacked, the Lord never turns tail and runs. In the case of Paul and Silas, the attack wasn't really on the two ministers. After all, we don't fight against flesh and blood but against spiritual powers of darkness. What was going on behind the scenes was a showdown between God and the devil. The Holy Spirit's power released the fortune-teller from her demon, so the devil was mad. He used the evil men who owned the girl to attack God's servants, thinking he'd actually get to God in doing that. In response, God shook the place that was supposed to hold Paul and Silas captive, showing that He is still in ultimate control. For good measure, He even drew the jailer to Himself, showing the devil that God's love and power extends beyond His current servants. (In other words, He took one of the devil's former servants.) The devil was pretty sneaky when he gave opportunity for Paul and Silas to sneak out of the town by night. Again, God won the showdown. He made the town leaders (no doubt on the devil's side, since they so strongly opposed Christ's work) actually have to beg Paul and Silas to leave. They gave Paul and Silas respect and had to humble themselves. What we could never see with our eyes in that final exchange is that God essentially humbled the devil. The devil has no power to do anything to God or His servants of any lasting effect. The devil thinks he has the upper hand because he has a few politicians in his pocket. As usual, God undermined the devil then, and He'll do it today. Praise Him forever!!

Strong Statements

If one looks at major miracles recorded in the Bible, Elisha is arguably the most active prophet without his own biblical book. In 2 Kings 6 - 7 he makes an axe float, reveals a fiery army of the Lord to his servant, and gives the enemy's war secrets to Israel's king without ever speaking with the enemy or leaving his home! In chapter seven he makes a very bold statement, indicating the end of a famine that will leave Samaria with plenty before the end of a 24-hour period. Of course, the king's servant doesn't believe that and makes another bold statement: "That couldn't happen even if the Lord opened the heavens!"

It seems to me that if Elisha, who performed the Lord's miracles and was never wrong, declared the end of a famine, one should believe him. I won't criticise the king's servant too harshly because I've been known to focus too much on what I see physically before. However, we can't miss the strongest statement of all here - the Lord's statement.

The king's servant had good (earthly) reason not to believe Elisha. The Arameans had laid siege to Samaria, blocking off the city from its food source. Things were so severe that people were eating their own children! The Arameans camped outside Samaria day after day, awaiting the time when the Israelites all starved to death or rushed from the city to be killed in desperation. There was no escape at all. A harvest to cure that type of famine may take a couple of years!

The Lord promised what He promised, though, and Elisha was determined that God was right. He told the doubting servant, "You won't eat of the food God will provide." God's statement had been made, but it only got stronger. That night, the same invisble fiery army of the Lord rushed through the Aramean camp, causing them all to flee in fear and to leave behind an enormous plunder (found, ironically enough, by unclean lepers instead of soldiers). The people came and took the plunder the next day. There was so much food that the famine was indeed over!

As for the doubting servant? He was trampled to death by the mob of people who rushed out of the city gate at the report of so much food.

(On a side note: It's interesting to me that the Lord didn't kill the Aramean army, but he let this doubter die. His mercy extended even to those who fought against His people, but the faithless servant lived no longer. Food for thought....)

No Control

Despite all my best efforts, it is almost impossible to control what I say. I've heard and believed that I should watch what I say, tame my tongue, or however you want to put it. Sometimes I do well. Usually I don't. Usually I end up saying things that are unnecessary, confusing, or even hurtful. When I get excited I often talk over people without realizing it.

Reading Psalm 141 this morning reminded me of my talking habits. David begins by asking the Lord to hurry to him, to heed his cry for help. Before he says anything else, he prays in verse 3, "Take control of what I say, O Lord, and guard my lips. Don't let me drift twoard evil...." He put it perfectly. What we say needs to be under control, lest we drift toward evil.

The rest of the psalm asks for help from David's enemies, but I don't think it's a mistake that David asked for the Lord's control over his speech before asking for anything else from the Lord. David and I are a lot alike in that neither of us has been able to watch what we say. If told to control our own tongues, both of us have fallen prey talking out of turn - or even simply for the sake of talking. Like David, my prayer is, "Take control of my what I say, O Lord, and guard my lips." If my mouth, like the rest of me, is under the Lord's control, then the things I say won't threaten to drift me toward evil!

Lord, I've said it before, and I'll declare it anew today: I am yours. Especially my mouth. Take control of what I say. My efforts to watch my mouth are nothing unless you guard my lips. As I choose to follow you today, I trust in your power to keep words of life on my mouth, so that I can speak your truth to everyone I encounter.

When Ministry Goes Wrong

Acts 14:8-28 has always been a horrifying (and a little funny) story to me. Imagine Paul and Barnabas, full of the Holy Spirit, doing ministry in Jesus's name. Paul heals someone in Christ's power, and the whole town shows up to worship Paul and Barnabas!

I've always wondered what really went wrong there. Was it simply something in the people? Was their faith so impure that they just assumed Paul and Barnabas were their native gods? Did Paul and Barnabas unwittingly encourage it? And how did the Jews from Iconium so quickly and easily win the hearts of the entire crowd, who turned from worshipping Paul to stoning him nearly to death?

It hits me, though, that this is likely not as abnormal as I think. My dad's former church, for example, wasn't worshipping him right before he left that church. Still, they thought he was great. The church was growing, and many of the people who came were there just to hear his "fabulous" preaching, which was rumored to be the best anywhere around. When mom left him and rumors started, the church was so quickly swayed by a small faction of the church against my dad (and now, stepmom). The church all but threw him out.

Take Ross DeMerchant a few years ago, too. He was the best thing that happened to youth in the Wesleyan denomination until he was discovered to be involved in an ethical nightmare. In his case, he did what he did, but it was remarkable to me that many people I know across the denomination were ready to remove him from the ministry and from Wesleyan memory forever.

When faced with people's pseudo-worship or outright disdain, may we remain stable in the consistency of God's truth like Paul and Barnabas did. The waves of human emotion and reaction will always be predictable. May we cling firmly to the Lord, our solid rock in our quest of oneness with the Father!

More Experiential

Most of my posts lately have been about things coming directly from the Bible. This morning's post is more experiential. The most recent Engage meeting had us all split up into small groups to discuss a lot of Colossians 3. Our group was fired up at the concept of taking off the filthy rags of sinfulness and putting on the righteous robes of God's love. I had decided to put on God's love through literal motions. I did that Monday and had a great day spiritually. Yesterday I forgot about it and had a marginal day. I didn't recognize the presumable "coincidence" until I prayed this morning. I prayed today, putting on the cloak of God's love first. Then I put on the armor of God. It's remarkable how differently my spirit feels this morning! You don't have to tell me that Colossians 3 wasn't talking about literally taking off and putting on of garments. However, this tangible expression is making me think through that prayer literally. I strongly recommend it. (Thanks, Lor, for leading that great session!)

Getting Serious About It

A couple of things struck me in Psalm 138 this morning. (I read the NLT.) It begins by offering the Lord thanks with all of one's heart, something I've heard a lot and strive to do. Immediately after that phrase, however, the psalmist talks about singing God's praise before the gods.

It seems to me that singing God's praise before the gods is much more serious than singing it before other people. First, singing praise before other people only requires us to say and do certain things in our praise. We often assess one another's commitment to worship by how engaged people appear to be. This judgment is folly. Even if a person claims to worship the Lord, people are fickle and will do a lot to please one another even though they don't care much about the Lord (see 1 Kings 22:19-25).

Second, singing praise before the gods essentially means singing praise before the very enemy of our souls. "The gods" refers to the myriad of false gods worshipped in the Bible (and today). None of them is God; they're all imitations, mostly made by human hands. It is the enemy of our souls that draws people into worship of the false gods. The enemy's aim is to take glory from God, if that were even possible. It's a serious commitment, then, to proclaim God's praise before the gods.

For most of us this doesn't mean destroying altars to Baal (or more contemporary false gods). For most of us it means giving glory to God in the face of those things that control us - addictions, habitual sins, and all of the encumbrances that hold us down. Whether the god has a specific name and form, the enemy of our souls knows whether we are glorifying the Lord or giving lip service. When we glorify the Lord in front of our enemy, we will be tried. Just remember that the Lord will work out His plans for your life and will not abandon those whose hearts are truly His (Psalm 138:8). Go out and declare God's praise before all people and the gods today!

Extreme Mercy

Sometimes the thought of God's mercy is overwhelming. It's commonly understood that God wants His followers to have clean hands and a pure heart. Psalm 15 is very clear that people with clean hands (blameless lives) and pure hearts are the only ones who may dwell in His presence. No amount of religious activities or strange practices are going to do anything to bring us closer to Him. It follows, then, that people without blameless lives and pure hearts are not honored by the Lord's presence.

King Ahab's problem in 1 Kings 29 is that his hands were unclean and his heart was impure. Verse 25 says that no one else in his time sold himself to evil like Ahab did. Ahab and Jezebel worshipped many other gods (and not the God at all), killed people to get what they wanted, threatened and killed God's prophets just for being God's prophets, and the list goes on. The Lord had it when Jezebel sent people to lie about Naboth so that the people would stone him. Then Ahab went and claimed Naboth's vineyard for himself, since Naboth wouldn't give in to the king's covetousness while he was alive.

I am no judge of people and won't say that Ahab and Jezebel deserved to die, but they were certainly a miserable lot whose hands were dirtier than the famed Lady MacBeth and whose hearts followed only evil. It's understandable that the Lord would send His prophet with such a foreboding message.

Interestingly, for the first time in his life and among the line of kings of Israel's history, Ahab repented. Truly repented. He fasted and mourned for the loss of his life at God's hands. Instead of trying to control God, he literally regretted his evil activities and humbled himself. God told Elijah that He noticed how Ahab humbled himself in repentance and would not destroy Ahab himself. His dynasty would still come to an end, but the Lord chose to honor Ahab.

Why would He do that? He'd do that because the Lord is incredibly merciful. He takes no joy in destroying people. He loved Ahab. The destruction of Ahab's dynasty was prophecied because evil would be destroyed with the dynasty. Yet, when Ahab turned from his wickedness, God had mercy on the man. This is good news for us. Many of us have lived lives with unclean hands and impure hearts. Even some of us who call ourselves Christians look in the mirror and know we have impurity in our hearts. We don't need to be afraid of God when we notice it; instead we need to acknowledge the impurity for what it is and repent. Repentance is not a magic trick to win God's favor, but His mercy (linked, of course, to His boundless, perfect, eternal love - see yesterday's post) endures forever. True repentance only comes out of a person who's humble enough to tear our clothing, put on burlap, fast, and mourn for our spiritual condition - metaphorically or physically. God will be merciful, giving you a new heart and washing you cleaner than newly fallen snow!

His Love Endures Forever

Psalm 136 has always stricken me as something different. The obvious reason is because every phrase is interrupted with the statement "His love endures forever." The more time I've spent with the Lord, the more moving this statement becomes. The Hebrew writer who originally penned Psalm 136 used the word "hesed" for "love." "Hesed" is an undying, faithful, merciful, gracious, boundless, perfect love that only God can express (this side of eternity, anyway). Once in prayer I read the whole psalm, but I changed the statement to "His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever." I may or may not have cried like a little girl for an hour or so.

Think about it: His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.

Meditate on this awhile and try a couple of verses for yourself. For me it would be like this:

I responded to God's leading
His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.
And prepared for His ministry.
His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.
I met Natasha
His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.
And we are enjoying a fabulous marriage.
His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.
We have never needed a thing
His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.
And we're even able to bless others.
His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.
Now we're on Natasha's internship
His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.
With great expectations for changed hearts and lives to the glory of God!
His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever.

This could continue for days, but you get the idea. His undying, boundless, perfect love endures forever in everything we encounter! My prayer is that the love we're learning to have for Him will bless His name as we grow in an undying, boundless, perfect love relationship with Him!

Something We Never Expected

I think I'm a lot like the Jewish Christians in Acts 11. After the conversion of Cornelius and his household, the Jewish Christians weren't very happy that Peter had spent time eating in the home of a Gentile. After all, no Jew would remain holy after eating with a Gentile, let alone being in one's home. Their faith in Christ was the fulfillment (not the abolishment) of their Jewish faith, so it only made sense to them that they should stay away from Gentiles. I would've been the same. There are several "proper" things about Christianity that, if challenged, would cause me to bring many things or people into question.

Of course, the Jewish believers began praising the Lord for changing the rules when they heard Peter's testimony. The Gentiles were baptized in the name of Jesus and by the Holy Spirit, just like the Jews. Instead of questioning how that could be or assuming that Peter was off his rocker, the Jewish Christians embraced the change they couldn't understand. They saw that repentance and the infilling of the Holy Spirit is a privilege of following Christ, not just a requirement for Jews who wanted to convert. They worshiped God for "changing" things. This is where I'm not so sure i'm like the Jewish Christians. I don't necessarily feel challenged on anything in my faith right now, but when I do, how will I respond?

Here's the most interesting thing of all. The whole time I read Acts 11 I had this sneaking suspicion that we Christians are on the threshold of something like this. I have the impression that the Holy Spirit is going to move in such a way that we're going to be left having to choose to worship the Father in Jesus's name or to become stubborn. The stubborn first century Christians were Judaizers, people who tried to make everyone comply with Jewish laws before coming to Christ. These were also enemies of the Gospel in many respects. When the Holy Spirit sweeps across the continent and world with this new thing, I pray that my spirit will be quickened to respond in worship instead of antagonism.

The Gift

I'm about to walk on thin ice with some people who read this blog. Nevertheless, today's blog is about the gift of tongues.

Frankly, I've never been 100% satisfied with any theological treatment of the gift of tongues that I've heard. I understand that there may well be excellent theologies about the gift out there, but I haven't heard one yet. The reason I'm so dissatisfied is because the theologies I've heard about the manifestation of the gift of tongues tend to seek rational explanation and often end in rules. For example, there are those Christians who believe that a person is only filled with the Spirit if she or he has spoken/speaks in tongues. There are also those who say it is a manifestation of the devil and ardently forbid it. Then, of course, there's the theology with which I'm most familiar, which explains away the mystery and discourages its practice at large.

I may never have had questions about the gift if it weren't for Cornelius. After all, the gift manifested in Acts 2 can easily be explained as a gift in which many people who spoke divers languages heard the same message simultaneously in their home tongue. Like 1 Cor 14 says, that manifestation of the gift of tongues would have been for the unbeliever. Thus, any public manifestation of an unknown language would require immediate interpretation, as Paul explains to the Corinthians. I get that, and I even agree.

What does a person do with Cornelius, then? When he and his family were filled with the Spirit, they spoke in tongues. This must have been a language unknown to Peter, the believers, and the people in Cornelius's house. Cornelius and Peter obviously spoke a common language (likely Greek), or they never would have been able to communicate in Acts 10, so he wasn't speaking Greek. They also weren't speaking Aramaic or Hebrew, as it's arguable that Peter and his Jewish comrades knew those languages. They also would have recognized Latin as the Roman language, even if they didn't understand it. Thus, the Gentile family was filled with the Holy Spirit, spoke in some unknown language, and were not shut down by the Christians who brought the message. Instead of quieting Cornelius and his family, they stood in awe that the Lord had moved so powerfully among the Gentiles.

Are we missing something in some of our North American evangelical churches? I do NOT puport that we go out seeking the gift of tongues as proof of the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. If the Spirit is in you, then He will manifest His fruit and some gifts as He sees fit (Gal 5, 1 Cor 12). However, I'm familiar with many Wesleyans, Baptists, Methodists, and so on who are afraid of an unknown tongue because it supposedly takes us out of our right minds and into ecstatic expressions of worship.

1) Though we may think about ourselves according to Greek philisophical terms, we are all made up of our spirit, mind, will, emotions, and body. These elements are not really separated at all. All of those things are affected when one thing is affected. All of those things are involved in Christian worship. If our minds are engaged in worship, then so should our spirits, wills, emotions, and bodies be engaged in worship. If we're compartmentalizing ourselves in worship, then our worship is not an offering of ALL that we are. Compartmentalized worship leaves room for part of us not to be submitted to the Lord.

2) Again, the Holy Spirit gives spiritual gifts as He sees fit. Apparently, He saw fit to give an unknown worship language to Cornelius and his family in Acts 10. Does that mean we should all rush around speaking unknown languages? Not necessarily. Neither, however, should we allow our own minds, wills, emotions, and bodies to decide how the Holy Spirit chooses to manifest Himself.

I may never understand Cornelius, and I may never speak in tongues publicly. I'm fine with both of those things. After time in the Word today, though, I'm left praying for an openness to the Lord for His real and effective work in me. If I'm shutting out the gift of tongues, what else am I shutting out? How open am I really, if I'm dictating how the Lord can or cannot move in me?

Okay, now that I've opened that can of worms.....

God's Presence

Psalm 133 compares harmonious unity with some very beautiful things. Of course, those things are relatively obscure, too. For starters, the passage states that harmonious unity between brothers is like the oil used to anoint Aaron, the first priest of Israel. Remember that the oil used in that ceremony was representative of the presence of the Lord. When Aaron was anointed priest, the oil was the symbol God chose to use as a sign that His presence was in and upon Aaron. He wanted to make it clear that Aaron was His chosen spiritual leader. The oil that symbolized this honor ran down Aaron's hair, onto his beard, and onto his robe. That much oil was used as the Lord literally bathed Aaron in His presence.

Secondly, harmonious unity is compared to dew from Mount Hermon that ends up on Mount Zion, where God pronounces everlasting life. The morning dew that settled in Zion was refreshing. Zion, of course, refers to that part of Jerusalem better known as the City of David - in the desert. The dew would come in the mornings to refresh the people, the plants, and life in general. Both Mount Hermon and Mount Zion were places of significant divine revelation in the Old Testament, the latter indicating the place where the Lord chose to settle among His people. The Lord pronounced HIs blessing in Zion, promising everlasting life to those who remember the spiritual significance of Zion. Zion almost always means God is here to give people everlasting life. (What a fitting prophecy of Jesus's ministry that declared everlasting life in Zion!)

It seems that Psalm 133 is saying that harmonious unity between brothers (and sisters, I imagine) communicates the very presence of God. Unity among spiritual brothers and sisters is a picture of God's presence that anoints His people for His good work. Unity among spiritual brothers and sisters is a picture of God's presence that refreshes His people, declaring the eternal life we'll live with Him. Perhaps these statements on unity explain how it is that people will know we are Christians when we love one another (John 13:35).

Too Much Today

There's too much to write about this morning! I'll do my best not to go overboard.

The story of the man of God in 1 Kings 13 has never sat well with me. I decided to ask the Lord about it today. Why would He send a man of God with His message, show His power through the man of God, and punish Him for listening to the lies of the old prophet? Why would the man of God be held responsible for the old prophet tracking him down and bringing him into his home to disobey God's exact command? The Lord opened my eyes to something new today, though. The man of God had specific instructions from the Lord. He delivered the message to king Jeroboam, and the Lord's power was displayed. What was it in the second half of the Lord's message (not to eat or drink in Bethel) did the man of God not believe? The man of God ignored the Lord simply because the older prophet coaxed him. The nameless man of God was obviously hungry, and he was distracted that someone else could be a prophet in such an evil place. He wasn't following after God, even after God had proven Himself powerfully. That is why the man of God died. To let him live would have spoken as loud a message to the people of Bethel as splitting the pagan altar and shriveling the king's hand.

More briefly, read through Psalm 132 once or twice. It's almost too obvious to point out, but I am really blessed to read a prophetic psalm that clearly points to Jesus! Especially verse 17: "Here I will increase the power of David; my anointed one will be a light for my people." Praise the Lord!

Thankful for Grace

I've had quite a bit to say about Solomon recently. His reign over ancient Israel was remarkable, as was his commitment to the Lord early in his life. What's shocking is the spiritual breakdown that occurred later in his life. Solomon continued to live according to his heart's desires, particularly with women. Several of his wives wouldn't worship the Lord, so he built altars to the false gods. Then, under the influence of his wives, he also worshipped the false gods.

The Lord is rightly indignant about this. After all, He appeared to Solomon twice!! Living for the lord becomes pretty intimidating when we think about Solomon, the wisest person to live, specially anointed by the Lord, having seen the Lord twice, who ended up chasing other gods. He still worshipped the real God, but God wants to be the only God/god worshipped. If Solomon, who had everything going for him, turned from the Lord, how can I stay faithful for the rest of my life? I have much less wisdom, and I have only come close to seeing the Lord once in a dream.

Grace. This is the answer. I'm not trying to talk Christian-ese here, either. We've all experienced grace in some way. God's grace, however, is a perfect grace that comes from His love. We couldn't find ourselves in circumstances of grace on our own. God gives us grace - grace to follow Him every day. Solomon had the opportunity to repent, but it's not recorded (in 1 Kings anyway) whether he did that. Solomon's son, from whom the Israelite nation would be taken away, also had a second chance. Rehoboam chose instead to listen to friends, so God's word through Ahijah the prophet stood firm. We get second chances, too. We get grace, too.

Incidentally, Trish, I think this speaks a lot to your beef with people who claim to be sanctified. I could very well be one of those people whom you've heard claim to be entirely sanctified. I could very well be one of those people whose pride (or something) has caused you to question that. Any type of work the Lord does in our lives is an action of grace. We don't become perfect at that point. I, for one, need the Lord daily. He constantly shows Himself to me, also revealing parts of myself that need pruning. We live in grace. It's that grace that enables us to claim in faith that God's work of grace is being completed.

One Way We Learn to Fear

When I think of fearing the Lord, I tend to think about honoring and respecting Him for His greatness. I think of a service I was in once in which Steve DeNeff proclaimed the might and splendor of the King from various Scriptures like Isaiah 6 and excerpts from John's revelation. I think of His ever-presence, eternal knowledge, and boundless power.

Then comes Psalm 130:4, in which the psalmist writes that God offers forgiveness so that we might learn to fear Him. Think about that. Rather than keeping an eternal record of our wrongs, God's inexplicable love is behind an offer of forgiveness. In the face of God's wonder, His majesty, we begin to feel pretty small and unworthy of a relationship with Him. Yet, He knows us intimately and offers us pardon from our unworthy shortcomings. Indeed, He will redeem us from every kind of sin (Ps 130:8).

This knowledge - that God is far beyond our comprehension and ability to live well AND that He knows us and willingly pursues us for a lasting love relationship - inspires me to fear.

Worship at the Temple

What do you think of the Temple dedication in 1 Kings 8?

I think at first glance it is easy for a person to misunderstand Solomon. After reading the chapters of the great cedars send down from Tyre, the extravagant carvings on the three-story Temple, and encasing everything/decorating in gold, one wonders if Solomon doesn't struggle with his riches. Maybe all his wealth is going to his head, making Him completely misunderstand who the Lord really is?

I'm going for a "no" on that one. Look more closely at the passage. Verse 5 indicates that there were so many animals sacrificed in worship that no one could count them all. Many times in his lofty prayer, Solomon asks the Lord to show His faithfulness to Israel again and again. He speaks about love of the Lord's decrees. He institutes a seven-day festival just to dedicate the Temple as he marveled that the eternal God who cannot be contained by the heavens would actually choose to dwell in the (relatively) humble Temple of Jerusalem.

Solomon wasn't caught up in riches (at least not at this point). Solomon was consumed with a zealous love for God. When was the last time I gave myself, my talents, my money, my dreams, my ambitions, my hopes, my longings, my secrets so much to the Lord that people couldn't recount all I had given? When was the last time I prayed for the Lord to reveal His faithfulness instead of praying for a new car? When was the last time I actually praised God for His decrees, declaring my willingness to obey His every word? When was the last time I threw a party to celebrate some awesome mystery of our Lord?

Perhaps if I spent less time judging Solomon (and modern-day Solomons whose extravagant worship and buildings seem a little "much") and more time drawing near to the Lord, then I might not be able to help myself but worship extravagantly because He would draw near to me.

Two Things This Time

1) Proverbs 16:32 says that it is better for a person to have self-control than to conquer a city. Some days I think it's not only better to have self-control, but it's also harder. I've never tried conquering a city, but it's pretty easy to wield around my "power." It's pretty easy to become defensive, sending my quips back onto other people. It's pretty easy to make my problems about other people. It's pretty easy to judge people by assumptions, taking the offensive to bring them down. Yet, to control my defensive, biting, problematic, judgmental self is more difficult than I can write. How good it is to have God's grace and mercy! May His Holy Spirit continue to flow in me for the production of His fruit (Gal 5:22-23)!

2) The next verse says, "We may throw the dice, but the Lord determines how they fall." This is true for me for two reasons. First, I received some news this morning that leaves me with mixed emotions. A brother in Christ I was only getting to know passed away this weekend. I didn't know him well, but somehow I had a connection with him that has left me emotional all day. I'm comforted that He's eternally in the Lord's care in perfect glory, but my world is still a little shaken. Second, I am not so sure about our plans after Natasha's internship. We've contemplated staying put because the church is great. I've been accepted to continue my master's degree at MacDiv. I've also had the first encouraging and exciting conversation I've ever had with a pastor this week about worship ministry. Any of these directions will be a mental shift, and none was expected even three months ago. This verse is true because God is unpredictable. This verse is also true, reminding me that we can rest in His consistency. Bless Him forever!

Making a House a Home

Have you ever been to a really beautiful home that the owners/renters obviously spent time putting together? Have you ever walked into a home like that, only to be surprised at the negative atmosphere of the place inside? I'll bet we can all think of examples of people we know with beautiful homes, cars, and things that still come up lacking. We all know at least one person who works like crazy trying to accomplish something, when the only thing they achieve is a new prescription at the doctor's office.

I'll never forget my first early morning flight from Saint John to Montreal. My ultimate destination was somewhere in the States, but many of the men and women aboard actually worked in Montreal and took the early charter flight regularly. I was literally one of two people on board not in a suit, tie, or dress. Many of the people around me had files, briefcases, and electronic equipment. A man sitting near me talked almost the whole flight about the home improvements he and his wife were doing. One got the impression, though, that their home improvements were only going to make the house look nicer. The marriage was tense, the children didn't care, and the man didn't necessarily like going home. His overall tone was that he had made it in his company, and he was doing it "for them." The trouble was that they "wanted more."

While some of the wants of his family were likely materialistic or greedy, one can't help but wonder when we stumble across Psalm 127. It states that home builders waste their time if the Lord isn't the One building the home. Guards and alarms are pointless if the Lord isn't the Protector of the family. Anxiety is what drives people to work uselessly, while the Lord is the Provider of the home in the first place. Jesus put it this way in several Gospel accounts: Consider the lilies of the field. They neither toil nor spin, yet not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed as one of these. If the Lord cares so much about lilies that are here today and will be thrown into the fire tomorrow, how much more does He care about you people that He loves?

What does it take to make a house a home? The Lord's ever-present blessing. Pray through your home, giving it to the Lord as His holy ground. Test Him in this. (This kind of a test is okay because it actually declares God's rightful place in your home.) If anyone is with me, you should testify.

It's Quite Normal

Having read through several blogs lately, I've discovered that I'm not the only one who occasionally looks in the mirror and thinks, "What in the world am I doing?" Serving the Lord can be a very daunting task. I wouldn't trade it for anything else (though I do work at Sears for the next six months). It's just that I regularly come to the point at which I think, "Lord, I'm glad this is on you and not me."

You can be encouraged with me, then, to think about Solomon. Solomon was the one king of Israel who truly had everything going for him, at least in the early years. He had famous wisdom, unimaginable wealth, and peaceful influence over the entire Near East. 1 Kings 4:34 states that ambassadors from nations far and wide would travel just to meet and listen to Solomon.

If we backtrack, we see Solomon as king in 1 Kings 3. He is new, but he's been king long enough to have a reputation for following in his father's footsteps. He's also been king long enough that his enemies are dead (see previous chapters) and that there is peace around him. Still, 1 Kings 3:7 records Solomon telling the Lord that he feels like an ignorant child when it comes to leading the Lord's people. Sure, he followed David's decrees and sacrificed to the Lord, but at least once he looked in the mirror and thought, "What am I doing? I can't lead these people!" So, of course, he asked for wisdom.

God loved it. Solomon didn't try to make up for his weaknesses, nor did he pick up "Leading from Your Strengths" and give 'er. He was plainly honest with the Lord. The Lord resultantly gave Solomon a new heart - one with wisdom and understanding (3:12). That new heart was what launched Solomon into leading Israel in a time of vast size, enormous wealth, great peace, and godly influence.

He's doing the same for us, isn't He? It doesn't matter whether you're leading a group of God's people congregationally or whether you're simply a Christian with the global influence experienced by any daughter or son of Abraham. He has given/will give us a new heart with which to lead. If you have that new heart, trust it. Pray the prayer of Psalm 31:4, "Into your hands I commit my spirit." If you don't have it, pray this anyway. AND BELIEVE IT!! Leading from His Strengths will get you much further, and even you will be shocked at the miracles God does through you.

God Never Forgets

As the troublesome period of the judges was coming to a close in early Israeli history, God appointed Eli as a priest and judge of Israel (1 Sam 1). Eli knew the Lord and was able to point young Samuel in His direction when necessary (1 Sam 3:8). Eli's sons, who were also priests, did not know the Lord (1 Sam 2:12). They continued sinning by seducing female workers in the tabernacle and stealing God's portion of the Hebrews' sacrifices. Eli knew about it and, by default, participated in the sons' sins as he refused to discipline his sons. That's why the Lord promised in 1 Sam 2:27ff. to remove Eli's family from the royal priesthood, not allowing any of his family members to live long or serve as priests. To confirm this, God's prophet predicted that the sons (Hophni and Phinehas) would die on the same day. They did in battle.

Now let's fast-forward to 1 Kings 2:21. Israeli history records the deaths of Hophni, Phinehas, Eli, and Ichabod's mother in 1 Sam 4. Though occasional characters pop up, the fulfillment of the prophecy above seems complete (or forgotten) until this 1 Kings passage. Abiathar the priest had been faithful to David for most of his reign. After David's death, however, Abiathar did not support David's choice to put Solomon on the throne. Solomon didn't murder Abiathar because of his faithfulness to David. However, he deposed Abiathar of his priestly duties. Check out 1 Kings 2:27, which indicates that this deposition was meant to fulfill the Lord's prophecy originally given to Eli at Shiloh.

We're talking about a VERY old prophecy that came when Samuel was just a boy, before he became a judge, before Eli died, before Saul was king, before David was king, before all the wars, and before Solomon was king. God never forgets, does he?

Why is this blessing me so much? It blesses me because one might ordinarily think that it's a small prophecy to fulfill after so many years had passed. I'm not sure that the majority of God's followers would notice had Zadok simply remained high priest with Abiathar on staff. That's just not how God works though. He says it and He does it.

If He does this in something that seems relatively insignificant to our salvation, what about the big things? What about His promise that He has already overcome the world? What about His promise that He's coming back to take us to the place He is preparing? What about His promise to keep us for eternity? We serve the God who doesn't forget things, small or big. We serve the God who has promised to draw all people to Himself, who is doing it, and who is making us completely new people who live in the freedom of life in the Kingdom of Heaven! Praise Him forever!

Those Who Need to Understand This Will Indeed Understand It

I closed my eyes and saw light. It was strange, so I opened them again. The sun was out, but it wasn't shining through the front window. I closed my eyes again. There it was - the light. It got brighter and brighter as my eyes focused.

As my eyes focused I noticed a form on which the light was shining. I couldn't make out the form; it just looked like a rock. The light was so bright that it reflected off the surface of the rock.

As I focused on the rock-like figure I noticed that an arm of light formed out of the light itself and began moving across the figure. A thin layer of something flaked off the rocky figure when the arm pulled it. Underneath there was a dark gray color - until the light hit it.

Then another arm appeared and starting pulling off the large flakes from the figure. The two arms alternately pulled layers from the figure, exposing something dark. Still, every time the light hit the rock, it became light again. The shape and size of the rock-like figure never changed, but layers were being removed and replaced with light all the time.

I saw that on May 14.

Finally

Natasha and I are finally settled. The move went well, thanks to a handful of people who were available at the right time. There's nothing like a relocation to get you offline for awhile. Anyway, we're surfacing again after a time without address or phone number. I'm not about to post them on this public blog, but you can e-mail us if you want to know more. :)

From Graham Cooke

He (the Lord) is the one who sends us out as lambs among wolves. Why? Because the Lion is padding along beside us.

The nation

My coworker and friend "Do you know who I am?" the Irishman is a great one, that's for sure. He's developing his own little nation, much like Ireland but without so much religious strife. He left me some fun messages on the voice mail tonight. It just reminds me that he'll really miss us when we leave town. I'll really miss him (and his wife) too. :)

Okay, enough of the sappy posts. I'm really worked up lately about the Indian people groups. I'm not mad or offended; I just think there's so much more to the story than we ever hear in history class. My next opinion: we're blind to our ignorance and rudeness to people who aren't like us.

Some tools

Randy Woodley writes in his Living in Color that Satan uses tools of division and uniformity to try and control God's plan for diversity and unity. He makes an interesting point by saying that humans often ignore their diversity, opting instead divide themselves according to their differences. Once those divisions are made, people in each division seek a culture that is uniform with their "in" group. Of course, he is referring to large cultures or racial groups.

Could this be something Christians do? Do we divide ourselves along lines of how we worship, how we interpret theology, where we worship? Do we demand a uniformity of other Christians under the assumption that all Christians do things one way? Where does diversity and unity fit in the Church theologically? How about in worship?

Family Distance

Sometimes family distance sucks. I really miss my brother. He is such a wonderful guy. I just miss him like crazy. I want him to move here. What makes it worse is that I really like his wife, and I miss her, too. They are a great couple, and I miss them. My heart is heavy for them today because I long to hang out with them. Yes, I'm sooky. :)

Testimony

Our small group has experienced the Lord on several occasions recently. A couple of weeks ago the Lord healed me of some bitterness and unforgiveness I didn't even know I had! You can imagine, then, that I had some pretty high expectations for last night's discussion.

The discussion, on "soul ties," taught about the healthy and unhealthy connections we develop with other people. The discussion centered largely on the unhealthy ones, calling us all to freedom from those connections. The thing was that I didn't necessarily sense any unhealthy connections. After listening to the recorded teaching, we all talked for awhile. We also prayed. The Lord helped me to see how some unhealthy connections to my family were wreaking havoc in my spiritual life. I prayed to break those connections, not knowing how things would change. Oddly enough, after I prayed I felt light and free! The Lord has done something powerful, and I cannot wait to see how this healing manifests in my life!!

If You Marry a Singer...

...prepare to have your heart moved in unexpected ways. Sometimes the singer you marry will write you a song that makes you want to shout your love to the world even though the song leaves you speechless. There aren't words for what happened the other night. Many of you who were at the recital saw what happened, but you just can't know. I want to tell you, but my singer wife took my breath, words, heart, and love away. If only there were adequate words to put into an amazing Natasha post....

This goes without saying (though I'll write it anyway), but the Lord is AMAZING! How could He know that I'd need this? How could He create two people, bring them together, and put them in a place in which their love for one another only made them both stand in awe at their love for Him? If Natasha loves me enough to write the perfect song, the Lord loves me enough that His expressions are a symphony. He has wowed me with the wife He created just for me.

If you marry a singer...

...be prepared. At some point in your marriage you'll get a night like tonight in our home. We've traversed skies of styles and wandered continents of content. Right now it's "Hopelessly Devoted" (not bad), but a minute ago it was "There Are Worse Things I Could Do." And we're going through the entire songs. To think we started this evening with worship. Pretty soon "Therapy" will get into her head for the fourth day in a row. She'll mumble through the words until...you guessed it..."Go drop dead!"

And I actually think this is endearing. Somewhere in there, I must be crazy. Oh well, if you can't beat them...

"I'm gonna love you like nobody's loved you, come rain or come shine." (I'll finish the rest of it offline.)

Natasha's Senior Recital

You may have seen this on MySpace. If you go there, it will only direct you back here though. :) There are invitations out there to the following effect, but you don't need a printed invitation to come....

NATASHA'S SENIOR RECITAL

Friday, April 7, 2006

7:30 p.m.

BBC Nicholson Hall

(light reception to follow)

So, you'll hear much more about this in the time to come. She's a great singer, not to mention anointed by the Lord for it. Hopefully we'll see you there. (There's no need to RSVP.)

Next Opinion

I think Jesus submitted Himself to people.

Freedom of Religion

Abdul Rahman is currently under arrest in Afghanistan because he is a Christian. CNN reports that the Afghan consitution is based on Sharia, Islamic law. It is my understanding that Sharia requires adherence to the Islam faith. CNN reports, "apostates can receive the death penalty." Again, this is the law in Afghanistan.

Western nations (led, of course, by the US) are stating that any democracy should permit religious freedom among its people. Here are my next couple of opinions:

1) If Afghanistan submits itself to Sharia, then the country is a theocracy, not a democracy.

2) If Afghanistan submits itself to Sharia, then there is only freedom of religion enough to exist as Suni or Shiite. Anyone else is apostate.

Am I missing something here? Why do we in the West assume that this is a political thing? Politically, we're expecting a nation to go against its constitution, something at which we would balk if the tables were turned. Nevertheless, the country is ruled by Islam, a faith. Why does it surprise us, then, that the issues in a theocracy are faith-based?

One Clarification

I look up to Redfox, so I need to clarify something for him and all people like him. Permanent residency in Canada does not revoke my American citizenship. I am not a Canadian citizen yet. Even if I were, I'd be able to remain an American. Think about my PR card like a green card. It just means I can live and move around freely in Canada without having to get new permits and visas every time I turn around.

Redfox is a humble and precious man of God. I also know he will always keep me humble. :)

It's Official

I am a permanent resident of Canada.

Something that Sucks About Work

Next opinion: working sucks. I like my job, and I'm grateful to be in ministry. However, actually having to have a job is not fun when it dictates your personal life. When I was younger and immature (note, not necessarily more immature) I never had to answer to anyone if I planned on volunteering with a ministry. Now that I have a "real" job, I do. Grr.

Okay, now that's off my chest....

North American Persecution or Cry for Equality?

Read this.

Now, what do you think? Is this a form of North American persecution from people who are going to conservative Christian campuses to stir things up? Or, is it a legitimate cry of equality from people who haven't been counseled through their feelings of abandonment from conservative Christians?

It's interesting to me that every place on the list is a conservative Christian college EXCEPT BYU and West Point.

Another Opinion/Confession

This post comes from an inner battle that has taken place for almost three years. In high school I was pro-life, ready to debate anyone who wanted to. This position was taken largely because I assumed that Christians had no choice in the matter. Then I realized that the Lord has allowed several abortions to take place, allowing women to make their own choices. It was a fact that women were choosing to have abortions, and I felt that Christians should not hold non-Christians to the same standard of living as they choose to live. Though I personally felt abortions were murder, I have been politically pro-choice up until two weeks ago. (Obviously, this is news to most people who read this. You don't even say the words "pro-choice" in a conservative place like BBC, for fear of condemnation, weeping, and gnashing of teeth.)

My reasoning for the pro-choice decision went something like this:
1) Women are having abortions, like it or not.
2) Women have had abortions for centuries, like it or not.
3) It is only recently that we have the opportunity to provide safe and healthy means for women who are choosing to abort anyway.
4) We should, therefore, provide safe and healthy means for women who are choosing to abort.
5) Meanwhile, we can hopefully counsel women away from abortion, helping them understand the emotional and physical damage they're about to undergo.

Then two weeks ago it hit me: I wasn't providing safety and health as much as I was enabling something I think is cruel and wrong. Studies show that women suffer enormous trauma before, during, and after abortions (especially during and after). We don't hear about this because women hide their deepest trauma when they don't feel safe to share it and heal from it. Abortion is also eliminating a life with a heartbeat, unique DNA, etc. Providing private, sanitary places for women to do almost irreversible damage to themselves and certainly irreversible damage to their babies is doing NOTHING to make the situation better.

Here's my reasoning now:
1) Women are having abortions now, like it or not.
2) Women have always had abortions, like it or not.
3) Women have not always had private, sanitary clinics in which to abort their babies.
4) The presence of clinics simply makes an ancient process very private and sanitary.
5) The presence of clinics does not lessen the murder rate or female degradation and trauma.
6) The presence of clinics simply makes abortion an easier choice in which one does not have to consider things like murder rate, degradation, or trauma if one so chooses.
7) Thus, the presence of legal clinics is enabling murder, degradation, and trauma.
8) Women will still choose to abort their babies, whether or not it's legal.
9) Some women will choose to carry the baby to term, if they consider the consequences of abortion without clinics.
10) Laws should be put in place to remove abortion clinics and illegalize abortion.

In a timely manner the US is brewing over the South Dakota decision to defy Roe v. Wade. Opponents of the pro-lifers say that women, their doctors, and their families should be able to make personal health care decisions without government interference (from the president of Planned Parenthood president, Cecile Richards). Someone who thinks a responsible health care decision is to eliminate the life of one's baby, to disrupt the natural pregnancy cycle and throw the reproductive system into disarray, to put one's life at risk to eliminate another life, and to ask for the emotional depression that comes after eliminating the life of one's own child (similar to losing a wanted baby, but often worse, according to studies I did for an ATS paper last spring), desperately needs SOMEONE to interfere. Maybe the government shouldn't dictate health decisions, but abortion isn't a decision for health and wellness.

In other words, I'm pro-life now, politically and in my convictions. One last word, if you're still reading: forget about all the exceptions. I'm not stupid; I understand that there have been/will be cases to prove me wrong. My point isn't to overgeneralize an issue to the exclusion of case-by-case consideration. So, save us the defensive response to throw up all the exceptions that we all know exist.

Next Opinion

It should not matter whether we "get something" out of worship.

1) We don't usually mean that we're getting nothing out of worship. We usually mean that the music, preaching, and meeting with the group of Christians did not have a particular result. Generally, we mean that we didn't really worship at all.

2) Worship isn't about us. When we make it about God, we tend to "get" something, yes, but that usually doesn't come because we wanted to get something out of it. God blesses when He is glorified and can move freely among His people. (Yes, I know that no one can limit God if He wants to move. Does He really want to move where He's not welcome?)

3) Is God really not worth worshiping if we "get nothing" out of it?

Opinion #1

I am not a fan of Sean Hannity. Generally, I'm not a fan of Rush Limbaugh either, but I'm afraid he's right about Mr. Hannity when he says he's rash. Messrs. Hannity and Limbaugh are like me in that we all generalize and judge. If the two of them are fair game on each other, why not join the political pundits?

1) Mr. Hannity attacked Hilary Clinton on his radio show last evening for her recent involvement in the port security issues in the US right now. He said that she was only interested for political reasons and had no historical basis for her sudden interest in homeland security. He cited her silence when communist nations controlled both ends of the Panama Canal after the US relinquished control of the canal under Bill Clinton. Another democrat was called for his opinion but was not allowed to give it. When the democrat began talking about Ms. Clinton's participation in port security bills since 9-11, Mr. Hannity balked, accusing the democrat of changing the issue. While Mr. Hannity has a point in questioning Ms. Clinton's prior silence, his guest was correct when he said that was before 9-11 when the world didn't take such extreme measures to avoid terrorism. Regardless of the past issues, Ms. Clinton is a completely different politician now than she was in 1996 as the First Lady. Mr. Hannity was just picking at an easy target.

2) Mr. Hannity also attacked a guest on his show who mentioned his preference to call in the police force and firefighters in the event of a similar attack on his home city, San Francisco. "What are the Marines going to be able to do after an attack?" asked the caller. Good point. Mr. Hannity took that as an attack on the US Armed Forces and President Bush. The guest was as surprised as I was that the comment could be taken as such. Were the Marines there to stop an attack, I could see Mr. Hannity's point. Otherwise, the police force and firefighters have done a lot in crisis situations and will be valuable to the city.

The moral: Too much talk radio on a long drive from Bangor will get you fired up and mad at people who put issues where there aren't really issues and who put principles before people.

I'm Not Ignoring Missy Silver - Nickerson

If you've watched, MSN asked me for my opinion. Here's why I haven't responded:

1) Many people have been asking my opinion about things lately. It's like a drawn-out version of AP's "Who Wants to Know My Opinion?" I've considered doing a bunch of these on the blog, but I'm still thinking about it.

2) There are some issues about which my opinion would incite a riot. Worship is one of them. (Trust me, it's coming. It just needs to come in a gentle, understanding way instead of an I-know-it-all way. I don't, so there's no point in lying about it.)

3) I'm having too much fun reading everyone else's opinions.

Today's opinion: 4:00 a.m. is MUCH too early to wake up, even for a cheap flight back to the east coast.

Border

Who knew that crossing borders could be so difficult?

1) I entered Maine from Milltown, NB, last Wednesday night - you know, the little border crossing on the way to BGR. I told the guy I had only the bags he could see, nothing in the trunk. He wanted the trunk popped. I struggled with our broken glove compartment and gave him the key to open it the old fashioned way. Imagine my surprise when he asked what the bags were. Ah, yes, the bags of clothing for the sharing club. Oops. I got to pull over and go talk to the US customs.

2) Today I entered Abbotsford, BC, from Sumas, WA. Everything was fine until the Canadian customs official alerted me that I, as a Canadian resident, could not legally drive my US-plated rental vehicle into Canada. I got to pull over and talk to the Canadian customs agents who told me, "The cops will fine you a lot of money for driving, but I don't see another option. Go ahead." I drove the speed limit and was more defensive than ever.

MIA

I'm not MIA, I promise. It's just that a spiritually intense weekend, the beginning of revival in chapel, preparation for a trip, a Vrooman wedding weekend, and admissions trips will really take a person off kilter. Josh and Kara's wedding was perfect. Honestly. I wanted to post about it before, but you know.... (Oh yeah, I'm doing homework and trying to be a good husband in there too somewhere.) More to come....

Christian Worship

Okay, this might start something. What do you think makes worship "Christian" as opposed to any other religion or adjective that you might put in here? Why bother?

Disappointing Days

It's really disappointing when you call your dad to wish him Happy Anniversary and are greeted by a mechanical voice that says, "The number ***-***-**** has been disconnected." I knew Dad and the fam were moving, but he said he'd call with the new number and address. They did not. (Still haven't.) Fortunately, I had Dad's cell phone number. (To his credit, the fam has gone exclusively to cell phone use, so there wasn't a new number to give.) We talked, but that was very disappointing. Why wouldn't he call, when they moved two weeks ago?

I'm dealing with this. Pray for me to face it honestly and to move quickly to forgiveness. It's a little bit more difficult because I've had a series of disappointing days recently.

On the other hand, both AP and James called me this week. That was a blessing on both counts.

Danielle

Many of you don't know Danielle - or "IvorySing." (By the way, this is a great nickname for her if you've heard her sing.) She is a very deep sister in Christ whom I came to know over a year ago. She and her family are incredible; you'll all enjoy meeting them in Heaven. Now that you know her, I'm going to address her curiosity to "entire sanctification."

Danielle, I'm not going to argue with you because I think people who argue over doctrine are talked about in 1 Timothy 6 in a negative light. However, we're all wrestling with this issue of sin. To talk about entire sanctification completely from its biblical derivative would take an incredibly long blog or a brief, possibly inappropriate attempt at explanation. I'm going to go with the latter. (Sorry for all the big words you may encounter. Doctrines that are difficult to explain bring them out in me.)

Living a sinless life comes into play in the Bible at Creation. The Father created a perfect world without sin. Thus, His plan was a world with no sin. Note that He did not create a world without the possibility of sin. The sinless and perfect Adam and Eve were still tempted and still sinned. Thus begins the story of the Bible - God and people love each other; people give into temptation to sin; people are separated from God; God provides a way out; people are restored to sinlessness (forgiveness and eventually freedom from the bent to sin); God and people love each other again without sin.

That is a very simple take on the salvation story, but sinlessness was God's plan from the beginning and continues to be now. The terms "entire" and "sanctification" come together in thoughts that derive from Scriptures like 1 Thessalonians 5:23. It says, "May God Himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul, and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ." This verse is the one verse that puts simply what we're all trying to say with entire sanctification. This word "blameless" is a much better way to look at what we're talking about than sinless. It means that we cannot be blamed for our past sins and sinful origins.

Does this help? (I'm sure that AP or another genius can say it better, but let's stick with this for now.)

Parable of the Talents

I'm not sure why no one was brave enough to tackle the previous post about talents, but I've been mulling it over anyway. It was also part of the YOTB reading for yesterday, so I'm hot on the trail again.

Basically, I think that parable is a victim of poor Bible study. Tiff was on the right track when she uncovered the fact that the Greek word often translated "talent" refers to money. Remember that good Bible study means we take into account what the author meant for the people who he/she KNEW would be reading the account. Matthew 25 was written, most likely, to a first century audience with a strong background in Jewish tradition. If they understood "talent" as a monetary unit, then that's likely why Matthew wrote that word.

That means that the parable of the talents (money) is about stewardship. The principles are certainly applicable to talents (abilities), as Tiff nicely pointed out. However, it's a parable about stewardship of anything the Lord gives us. In the story the master gives talents to the servants according to their abilities (25:15). (Why would he give someone abilities according to their abilities? That's crazy, yet we all seem to fall victim to this Bible study approach.) One servant had the ability to manage a lot of money, another had the ability to manage an average amount, and another had the ability to manage very little. Each was then given the opportunity to make use of that money. Ultimately, each person was held responsible for what they did with what they were given.

This is a very simple analysis, but I think it's one worth considering. Most of my life I've seen this verse interpreted through people's natural talents, often being used to highlight people's talents and ignoring the responsibility we have in stewardship. WORSHIP IS NEVER ABOUT US, AND THAT INCLUDES HOW WE GLORIFY GOD IN THE STEWARDSHIP OF WHAT WE ARE GIVEN!! Does that mean we should hide our talents? Does it mean we should be silent with our spiritual gifts? Does that mean we should hide our money? Does it mean we should keep our ministries small? No, no, no, and no. That's what the third servant did that disappointed the master.

What we should do is put what we have to the Master's use. (That's the bottom line of the parable.) If it's spiritual gifts, may they be excercised frequently according to the Spirit's enabling. If our natural-born talents are involved, then we should be doing the same. If we're thinking about money, it is God's anyway, so let's put it to His use. This parable has considerably less to do with our talents than it does with how responsible we are to use and multiply what God gives us.

The Master gave you at least one gift according to your ability to manage it. I'm not concerned with what gift that is. Ask the Lord today how you're doing at managing that gift.

Feeling Good

Do you know what feels very good? Being able to call a friend or two at a moment's notice to ask for a prayer time later in the day. That's what happened yesterday when I was engaged in some spiritual warfare with Brent and Joy. There's no point hashing the whole thing out (suffice it to say that the Lord is eternally faithful), but felt wonderful to know that in times of absolute need, we could call. In part, that typifies the body of Christ, wouldn't you say?

Backwards?

I was reading in Christianity Today earlier today. An article there challenged my understanding of the parables in Luke 14. The heading (in NIV), "The Cost of Discipleship," is inaccurate, according to the columnist. If we really look, he said, we'd notice that Jesus was pointing out fools rather than disciples. If the original listeners were familiar with Hebrew tradition (arguably a good point), then the person who didn't finish the tower would be considered a fool (Babel), as would the king who fought without the real hope of winning (Israeli and Judean history).

If Luke was written to a Gentile audience, as some suggest, then can the columnist have his history straight? This passage, obviously calling people from folly into godly wisdom, is about discipleship. However, is this really a way of pointing out spiritual fools?

Not a Hoof

If you're reading through the Bible according to the plan, then you're reading Exodus right now. I've often heard that our Christian experience can be compared with the experience of the Hebrews, who were led out of captivity by the Lord with Moses at the head of the pack. We're delivered from spiritual bondage and led into the Promised Land of eternity. I've even heard that Ex 10:26 is a good parallel for our holiness - that not one hoof (or other part of ourselves) should be left behind in bondage.

That's all good, but this passage really slammed into me last night. Moses tells Pharaoh that not even a hoof of the least of the livestock should be left behind because they don't know how they are to worship the Lord. In other words, EVERYTHING needed to leave Egypt to go to Sinai so that EVERYTHING would be available for worship, should the Lord choose to tell them to worship with anything.

Are we like this in worship? (By worship, I'm not talking about music. Music and worship are completely different...even to a musician who's also a worship leader.) Do we bring EVERYTHING out to worship the Lord in case He chooses to ask for something in our lives? Moses knew that the Lord could ask for anything as an offering. Do we know that? If we do, do we bring everything? If not, why not?

I suspect this is why we do not see fulness in worship - we don't bring everything. We're used to bringing our bodies to church, small groups, or whatever. We're used to bringing our music. We're used to bringing our ears to listen and our eyes to observe. The only way for our ears truly to hear, our eyes truly to see, and our minds truly to comprehend (see Isaiah and Matthew) is for EVERYTHING about us to be available as an offering, should the Lord request it. Doesn't this sound like entire sanctification, too? You mean worship might actually have something to do with our sanctification? You mean our salvation is actually played out in our worship?

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Call

You know I can't leave this issue alone. Don't worry, B, I won't go off and exalt anyone unnecessarily. ;)

Perhaps Doc Taylor was onto something when he said we should get rid of the sacred cow of "call." I agree with him for different reasons than he might expect, though. "Call" is an archaic term to most common Christians. Kudos to those pastors who teach the principle, but what if we spent as much time and energy following God as we do trying to figure out the specifics of our call? Few young people know what it means; as many older people are intimidated by the term. Sack the principle? Never. Slaughter the sacred cow? Please.

Talents

Tiff preached something interesting about talents last night in Encounter. The message was clearly presented, and I'm glad she preached. She mentioned something that intrigued me though. The "talents" that were given by the master in Matthew 25 were understood in financial terms in Jesus's day. Obviously Jesus knew that, since He's the One who chose the words. What implications does the passage have for our financial well-being, then? Are Christians so busy drawing the point about using the talents God has invested in us that we forget about the financial implications (if there are any)?

Here's another thing. We all know that there is a difference between talents and spiritual gifts. Some time I want to hear Tiff's sermon as it applies (if at all) to spiritual gifts, since those are also gifts given by the Lord to be invested into others. What do you all think?

To Trish

This is actually for anyone who wants to read it, but it's especially for Trish, my dear sister who is writing what a lot of us have thought or are thinking.

I totally get your struggle with entire sanctification. You're not the only one who has thought about the seeming discrepancy between being "entirely" set apart for God and the life things that creep up to threaten our set apart-ness.

Think about it this way: we can only submit ourselves as wholly to God as we know ourselves. When we are entirely sanctified, or completely set apart, we offer God everything we are, crucifying everything that we are and letting Christ live within us (Gal 2:20). That means that Christ takes over everything.

If Christ takes over everything, that means the light of His truth will shine in our lives. When His light shines in our lives, we begin to see areas of our lives that were previously hidden in darkness. Hence, we have to deal with another issue. That doesn't mean we're not entirely set apart. It means that because we're entirely set apart, the Lord has free reign to uncover those parts of us that leave something to be desired. If we weren't completely His, He wouldn't force Himself into our dark corners to do some "house cleaning."

Remember, too, that our salvation comes by grace through faith. It doesn't come through acts of the entirely sanctified. Entire sanctification isn't a level in which one claims to have "arrived." Entire sanctification is a level in which one claims to have experienced a level of God's grace that prompted them to deepen their faith by submitting oneself completely to His control.

Henry

Meet Henry. I met him yesterday when Andy brought him up from Grand Manan. Compliments of Scott Ingalls, Henry lived out of the ocean from 8:00 p.m. (Atlantic) Tuesday evening until 5:30 p.m. (Atlantic) yesterday afternoon, when he joined eons of lobsters before him in the head-first waters of a lobster boil. A shout-out to Scott and Andy, and a happy afterthought of delicious Henry!

Going Crazy

I've just attempted to post another message three times, and it has yet to appear on the blog when I view my own blog. I think I'm going crazy.

An E-mail I Liked

I wrote an e-mail to someone the other day that I really liked. The reason I liked it was because the Lord was helping me work through something that brought some clarity to a person's confusion. It took over a week for me to "get it" because I was thinking too much instead of praying. It's similar to a recent post, but here's the text. (If you're reading this and recognize the e-mail to you, don't reveal yourself because I'm not going to.)

I think I have something to contribute to your dilemma though. Basically, I think the Lord helped me understand the difference between our passions and His anointing over the last week.

Our passions can come from Him or from ourselves. They involve things that we really enjoy doing and in which we find personal fulfillment. They resonate in our hearts and drive us. I think you have a passion for _____ and for _____. Following our passions generally makes us feel good, others feel good, and results in noticeable success.

His anointing is something that comes only from Him, but we cannot fight against it. We can choose only to live for it or not. We are anointed for obedience, regardless of what that looks like. I have been anointed to obey the Lord in making disciples of other people. Specifically that includes bringing people here to train for ministry. It includes leading a D-Group. It includes some personal mentoring with a few guys around here and elsewhere. Sometimes I like it, sometimes I don't. Sometimes others support it, sometimes they don't. The bottom line is that I'm living obediently according to God's anointing.

You need to decide whether you are anointed or passionate about things. Follow the anointing. Passions, regardless of their source, rest in our hearts, the most deceptive part of our bodies, according to Proverbs. Anointing has its source in the Lord and resides in our spirits. Allowing our minds, wills, and emotions to make decisions apart from the spirit keeps us in control. We need to allow our spirits (under the Spirit's control) to control our minds, wills, and emotions.

Whether your anointing will lead you to obey in _____, in _____, or in both, you need to obey the anointing. People driven by their passions end up like Saul in 1 Sam 15.

Entire

Why does the word "entire" throw people off so much? It's a normal part of the English language, one that we rarely think twice about. Put it with the word "sanctification," however, and walls are put up in our minds, wills, and emotions.

I think walls go up because we honestly believe that "entire" (meaning "wholly") and "sanctification" (meaning "being set apart") means something other than "being wholly set apart." Many of us have come to a point at which we've realized our need to be wholly (or entirely) set apart to the Lord. We pray, "Father, make all of me yours. I don't want to be called a Christian then act my own life. I want to be called a Christian with all of me living for you."

That's entire sanctification. Yes, it's a crisis. No, it doesn't mean any of us is perfect. (Yes, we can get into much more elaborate theological nitty-gritty. It will give you a headache, though, so trust me on this one.)

The Good Natasha Post

I love the way Natasha looks in this picture. It captures so many aspects of her inner beauty while doing a good job at expressing her outer beauty as well. (Natasha doesn't like her smile in it, but I say it's wonderful...photo compliments of Ryan Wiedmaier.)

Natasha is an enigma sometimes. She has so much strength of character, but her approach is so tender that people tend to feel calm around her. She has a very strong personality, something which I've seen in large measure since we've been married. (If you understand Littauer's work, we're both cholerics...what a recipe for fun!) :)

Natasha is talented at many things, too. She is obviously comfortable in her strengths, but I have seen few people approach her weaknesses with the bravery she has. During the darkest days of her fight with fibromyalgia, she always chose to make the best of each day. Even when she was told we would have to alter our diets if she wanted to live "normally" again, she chose to find ways to make it work. She has a real phobia of games, but she's even chosen to play games (like Guesstures last night...who saw that coming?)!

Is she perfect? No way. She won't go to bed without me and is frustrated when I sit up posting on my blog (half kidding). She tends to take on too much at once. To top it all off, she likes Sound of Music!!

Still, she's perfect for me. On the outside, she's the type of woman that artists for years have tried to capture in still life (without success, I might add). On the inside, her well-rounded character makes her outer beauty pretty dull. It must be rare to find this once-in-a-lifetime thing, and I thank God today (and every day) that somehow I found her. (And that somehow she is still blinded by love and gives me compliments that I shouldn't write on a blog that I know people read.)

Mistake 32,543,101

If I told you that Kirk and Virnna's baby was named Abraham Robert, I was misinformed. The earliest source of news said "Abraham," but Kirk himself sent pictures and a message that said the boy's name is ABRAM Robert. (For you girls and open-minded guys out there, the boy was 7 pounds, 8 ounces, or something like that.)

Now, isn't Abram cute?

Some Thoughts About Ministry

The Lord has called all of us. I've been in "trouble" on this very blog for suggesting that a call to ministry is different, so instead of "call" here, I'm just going to say "ministry." (I love B because he challenges me to think like a human being rather than like a know-it-all.)

Dean Higle brought some very key insights to understanding our development as ministers last night. Something he hit on lightly really stuck with me though. 1 Sam 15 naturally pits Saul's anointing against his passions, which I never realized before last night. Saul was in trouble because he allowed the passions of his kingship to rule over his anointing. He was anointed to obey God as a king, but he was passionate about conquering as a king. He conquered the way normal kings do, but God wanted an obedient servant who would live truly to the anointing.

What does this mean for us? It means that when we struggle about ministry, we need to remember God's anointing. Sometimes our passions and our anointing match. Other times they don't. What do we follow?

God's "call" rarely follows our passions, even if they are God-given. Rather, our passions align to God's anointing as it rests on us and as we grow in the likeness of Christ. We can do anything we want to minister, but if it's not an act empowered by God's anointing, then we're only acting on passions. Beware, ministers, not to confuse passions for anointing or call.

Okay, Really the Last One or I'm in Hot Water with the Mrs.

Okay, Natasha keeps trying to tell me it's too late and we should be in bed. This is true.

Anyway, I haven't done a good Natasha post in awhile. I hope to do a good sappy one soon. Here's a good reality check for all you young marrieds, pre-marrieds, and people who fantasize about that. Natasha - yes, the angel of my heart - tried my patience tonight. She didn't do anything wrong. I was selfish. Still, it happened. It's never good when we're both in a bad mood.

The point? It feels really good to feel so safe with someone, even when they pluck your nerves. It also feels good to know that she still loves me for me, when I was plucking hers much harder. Secure love is a wonderful feeling. Don't settle.

Possibly the Final One

I felt so guilty today when I walked in my office after several hours of admissions training to find a box from my mom, stepdad, and sisters. Mom is not always good at getting cards, etc., to the family on time. She mentioned sending Christmas cards, but I just assumed we wouldn't see much till later. Then we'd have the phone call we always do about the late card. I don't mind it - it's almost comforting to know what's coming.

Anyway, the box from mom was shipped before Christmas and arrived today. It had cards and gifts for my birthday (May), Natasha's birthday (December), our anniversary (December), and Christmas. They were all thoughtful gifts, communicating love and value.

The guilt wasn't so much because Mom spent way more money than she should have. Instead, it was because I honestly assumed we wouldn't hear from her this close to Christmas. What a son! Anyway, we're grateful because when both Mom (and Ron) and Dad (and Shelly) missed Natasha's birthday and our anniversary, I was pretty sullen. It looks like we weren't forgotten at all. Things just take awhile to get here from the U.S.A. (For the record, Dad and Shelly sent a Christmas card, too...without pictures of Bailey.)

Next

For those who were wondering, Natasha was invited to do her internship at Presque Isle Wesleyan. She'll start this summer, Lord willing. Many of you were putting 2 and 2 together already, but now you know. We're praying for details to come together. Hopefully that will start coming into place tangibly very soon.

First of Many

In the 2004 general conference of the Wesleyan Church, Leonard Sweet compared Christian evangelism to spreading the Starbucks brand experience. ("Brand" is a marketing term more than anything else as I use it here.) People must become acclamated to Starbucks terms and experiences, but it's still one of the most popular cafe experiences in North America (and rightfully so). Likewise, asserted Sweet, Christians ought not to tone down everything about a worship experience to avoid making non-Christians feel out of place. Non-Christians approach the Church (universal) expecting Christianity to be different. They assume it will be different and are disappointed if it's not. Those who subscribe to Sweet's approach would actually bring non-Christians along as they seek out Christ through Christian terms and experiences.

I saw the Holy Spirit move in such a Sweet (pun intended) way yesterday. A new heroine of mine who does not claim much in the Christian faith (only having a Catholic background) was recently at our college for business. In a meeting with our staff and faculty she communicated well about "spirituality" and "faith-based college life." The people in the meeting responded well to her, using as much Christian-ese as I've ever heard. Expecting discomfort, I prayed for the Father to move in the situation to ease any angst my friend may have felt. Instead of angst, there was a sense of understanding and connection as the meeting progressed. She was led through Christian terms and experiences. Before most of the people there realized she didn't stake much claim to Christianity, Sweet's principle had taken hold.

Who knows the eternal effect? My point is that we need not to dog people's Christian terms as much as we need to help others realize the point of the terms.

Fighting

You know, there's something about spiritual warfare that makes us want to fight. We get so worked up to be confronted with the enemy again that all we want to do is fight. We fight the urge to sin. We fight the impulse to relax. We fight the thought the enemy could, once again, be staring us in the face, threatening to attack us. If we're not fighting the enemy, then we're often fighting the spirit vs. flesh battle. Yet, with each battle we fight, we grow more worn out, more frustrated, and often guiltier.

Why do we spend so much time fighting when there is more strength in surrender? I'm not talking about surrendering to the enemy or the "flesh," to use a good holiness Christian-ese word. I'm talking about giving up the fight to the Lord. If the enemy cannot convince us to go to his side, he'll convince us at least to fight. Fighting will weaken us. Surrender seems even weaker, doesn't it? But it's not.

When we surrender to the Lord, it means truly emptying ourselves of our - selves. No more me. No more you. We surrender, an act of weakness and humility, to watch the Lord's strength overpower both the enemy and our "flesh" without breaking a sweat.

How do we surrender to the Lord? Simple - we stop dwelling on thoughts like, "I'm not where I should be spiritually," and, "I'm just not good enough," for starters. We all know that. None of us has arrived, nor will we. None of us is good enough. Deal with it and move on to real surrender that doesn't come by focusing on what we're not. That focus still keeps US at the center.

We surrender to the Lord when we continually pray to Him, without self-focus, asking Him to reveal Himself. I dare you to pray in earnest for a month, "Father, in the name of Jesus, loose your Holy Spirit to teach me about who You really are." You'll be closer to surrender then because God will be at the center and the thoughts you have of yourself won't be repetitve Christian-ese phrases that try to prove humility. Rather, statements of earnest confession, truth, and spiritual celebration will pour forth as we worship God for all that He truly is! Battles will not seem insurmountable either because He'll be fighting; we won't.

Temptation is Knocking

Temptation is a strange thing. Sometimes we don't recognize it. Sometimes when we do we don't understand why it's bad. A good friend of mine recently let me in on some of his own temptation. So did another friend. They both mentioned being fine most of the time...until....

Why is there always an until? I think there's an until because when we're doing "okay," we're doing it on our own. When we're really doing well overcoming temptation, we're not even thinking about it. Suddenly we think something like, You know, I haven't lied in four days! or Yes!! I haven't skipped my personal time with the Lord in a week! or I haven't let my eyes and mind wander into Internet porn for days! These are dangerous thoughts, friends.

These thoughts are dangerous because we take ownership. What initiates the thought of our victory is a temptation for that sin, right? A particular site pops into a girl's or guy's mind, and s/he automatically thinks, No, I haven't done that. Thinking that does nothing, though. It only leads to the until. The temptation never leaves. We take the bait of ownership, proudly declaring our own victory in our minds and hearts. Then we're surprised when we tell another lie, gossip, or replace God's love with the enemy's lust.

The point? When temptation comes knocking with the thought, You've done so well lately, immediately begin praying. Something I've prayed is, "God, fight this battle for me." Believe Him. The Father is chasing you with His love and will bring you through as purely as Christ in the power of His Holy Spirit! Hallelujah!

Two Things

First, my anniversary was Monday. What a wonderful weekend we had! We went to Halifax for the weekend. We saw The Sound of Music at Neptune Theatre, went to the Halifax Mooseheads - Saint John Sea Dogs game, and shopped like crazy. What an awesome time! Because Christmas weekend will be spent in Moncton, we opened gifts yesterday. Natasha is very good. That is all. (You need Chris Botti.)

And now for something a little more serious.

I read this quote today: "In coming to Christ we do not bring our old life up onto a higher plane; we leave it at the cross" (Tozer, Man: The Dwelling Place of God).

That is me. I realized in reading that quote how progressive my sanctification really is. Most things in my life have been left at the cross, but how often have I prayed that God would change my life to make it something better? Asking God to do anything to my life besides take it away and give me a new one smacks of my own desire to cling to my own life. The more I cling to me, the less I cling to Him. Think about this quote today, Christians. (If you're not a Christian, you probably don't understand where we're coming from. Don't be afraid to post if you seriously want to know what's up.)

One More Because I Can't Sleep

(I never should have left my apartment to disrupt noise earlier. Now I can't sleep.)

Most of you don't know what has happened recently. Here's the non-specific scoop. Natasha and I are praying about her/our internship placement. We have been approached by many churches. (Go figure - many people want Natasha's worship leading capabilities.) Most of these churches don't even have worship pastors, so this is a no-no for internships. Still, we've looked. We had a good lead that we thought ended in a closed door. It didn't. The door is still open. If you aren't praying with us, you should be.

If you know the specifics behind this post, you are not yet free to share with your friends. We have been confirmed nowhere yet. Stay tuned.

One More for the Good People Next Door

I was a jerk tonight. Right before I posted the other post I went next door to confront people in the townhouse "chapel." (If you don't believe me, check the door. It says "chapel," not "lounge.") They were wonderful people, but it was 11:30, and we are really tired tonight. It's noisy in there every night till almost midnight (another reason it should not be called "chapel"), and I'm usually very patient. It's been a long weekend, though, and I couldn't think or sleep. So I confronted.

Why do I share this? So that you all know that the rumors are true - I really am an uptight jerk when it comes to quiet hour. It's also so you don't think that the sudden stomping in and out of 66 Wesley Drive (a.k.a. townhouse center section) was because of bad people. I won't name the talkers because they're not normally the people who are loudest. (Yes, I really can usually tell exactly who's in there. My bedroom is on the other side of the kitchen wall. Kitchen - another reason it should not be called a "chapel.") Still, if you saw me coming or going and then saw the people who inevitably came out later, they're good people. Especially Andrew, who actually apologized, and I know he likely meant it...for all of those good people. (See, there really are some wonderful God-fearing people around.)

How It Went

Why does nothing normal ever happen in my life? Really. It's nothing huge this time, but as I should have expected, the gift thing wasn't exactly as I planned it. Here's how it went.

I took Friday off because my scheduled vacation day Wednesday was usurped by some college consultants who planned their visit after I planned my vacation days. This worked in my favor because I was able to set things up and get some other things done (i.e. banquet planning).

Natasha came home from morning classes about noon; I came home from jazz combo (Heidi was AMAZING on Friday night!!!!!!) practice around one. I mentioned presents time, but we didn't really get around to it until about two.

She loved the CDs, the ornament, and the pjs (especially the blue set...lounge pants, cami, and cardigan). The pearl earrings went over well, too. As she was opening the red pjs I remembered that I forgot to bring her card out of its hiding spot. I gasped, like a twit, and said, "Nothing." We finished opening the presents and put on the music.

Rebeckah (who doesn't read this blog because she thinks people who put personal things online are idiots) brought a curling iron for Natasha to use for the banquet, but Natasha's hair wasn't cooperating. She became increasingly frustrated, so I surprised Natasha by bringing out a Christmas present - hair straightener. (It had to cooperate with something, right?) That went well, but now I'm down one Christmas present and promised not to buy anything else after Remembrance Day. (Can someone help me justify?)

Then I did it. That's right. I forgot the card as suddenly as I remembered it at the wrong moment. She received the card this afternoon. (Fortunately, the birthday, banquet, and Christmas party - which is what Natasha really wanted for her birthday - all went well. The card still had the cry factor, which I didn't count on.)

I know, I know

Look, I can be honest and say that the number of people who actually read this blog is small. Regardless, for that one faithful reader out there, I'm well aware that I fell off the blog-wagon. I just finished a 45-page paper, a visit with guys from Florida, and putting together some music for the banquet. They're all excuses, but you have to admit that life is convenient for that. :)

Okay, here's today's post. It is finally Natasha time!!! I've been waiting for this for weeks, and it's here. Her birthday is tomorrow, but we're opening presents today. Then the banquet is tonight, one of her favorite times. Tomorrow we're going to get our (real) tree and decorate it. Our Christmas party is tomorrow night. Next weekend is our anniversary honeymoon. The following weekend is Christmas. I get to give the presents now!!! (Could time possibly have moved any slower?)

So, what's everyone doing for Christmas?